BAAAAH!!!!!

This week was mission conference. In 3 days I made 2 cakes(first), ate 3 cakes in one night(not a first), as well as some cow stomach and chicken feet, I met some incredible people, watched a small community of believers raise close to 11 000$ for missions over cake(5000$ of that I ate), and lastly God stopped me from considering missions. I am now certain in a calling for long term missions. After about 6 hours of sleep in those 3 days I was desperate to actually got to bed, and all i could think about was how good God is.

When I started considering missions i thought it was all about short term, and then I came to Heritage. Strangely, when I discovered that missions was all about commitment, I got even more drawn in. But when asking myself "why missions?" I could only answer some half-hearted, recited answer like "because i want to serve God." I starting having doubts about my true calling and lately i have been asking God to teach me about compassion and what it means to be a believer after God's own heart. And i starting getting really emotional all the time, and let's make this clear, I am Dutch, and we DO NOT know how to show emotion. So here I am crying over the simplest little things, and in walks Marty Frisk. If you want to see emotion, talk to Marty. I saw so much passion for the lost, not because it would be an adventure or a great story and testimony, but because he truly knows what God feels for his people...he weeps for them.

I remember the story Marty told about Marylin Lazslo, and how the village that she couldn't get to had built a church, waiting for someone to come tell them about God. Did anyone ever come? It was like a slap in the face to realize that people are not only open to the gospel, but are desperate to hear it! How many of these people never hear the gospel? How is it that missionaries can give their lives to God's cause?

This week i fully found out what God feels for his people, and i had no idea what to with it, as i was lying in bed thinking i felt like crying but in Joy of what God has done and what he will continue to do. God is good, that is all i can say because i have no words. He works in the most confusing and crazy ways, and all of those point the glory directly to him....he can take someones life, like Craig Simmons, and use even his death to raise 1000$ off of a cake in a school with 300 students for missions. God is good, and he is in control.